I don't have kids. I have dogs. Let me say for the record: I DO NOT believe my dogs are my kids. I'm not their "mom," I don't think of them as kids with fur. I love them so much because they are dogs. Canines. Non-humans.
Ok, now that we're clear on that, let me tell you why I think puppies are easier than kids.
- Puppies want only three things: food and water, sleep, and access to the grass for bathroom breaks. That's it.
- Puppies are so easily comforted and quieted. The pup is crying? It's for one of these reasons: lonely, scared, hungry, or gotta go (to the bathroom). Fixing the crying is SO easy, and it's so easy to figure out what the heck they want.
- You can CRATE a puppy. Legally! And it's encouraged. This, alone, is the very best thing about raising a puppy vs. raising a kid.
- Puppies grow into dogs really quickly. They are "kids" for only about 8 months or so. And "teenagers" for only a few months after that. Then they're laid back and easy.
- Puppy Breath! Need I say more?! Kids can projectile vomit into your face before you even know it's happening. But the worst (best, I think) thing that'll happen if you hold a puppy up to your face? You get puppy kisses that are full of puppy breath! I'll take puppy breath over vomit any day.
There you have it. And for all you parents out there: relax. I know you love your kids. And you should. I'm not saying puppies are better than kids, just easier. From my vantage point, at least.